actually i always like to imagine confusedly.
原來我總愛胡思亂想.
i imagine that if i had not done well at the very beginning, maybe i would not have needed to bear those things.
我想﹑如果我一開始不做得那麼好,也許我一輩子也不用背負著某些事物.
(the fact is that have you really done well? )
(是說又做得有多好.)
i imagine that if i had spoken more carefully, maybe i would not have had to review if i had said or done something wrong.
我想﹑如果我可以再謹慎那麼一點點,也許我不用每天回家總檢討自己是不是哪裡說錯了做錯了.
(the fact is that i am regretful)
(說後悔也不為過.)
i imagine that if i had tried to love you more, maybe you would have been happier and more satisfied in this moment.
我想,如果我嘗試愛別人多一點,也許你們會因此變得更快樂一點﹑更愛現狀一點.
(you are so arrogant.)
(很自大嘛.)
i imagine that if i could have loved myself more, maybe i would have lived better, more simply and freely.
我想﹑如果我可以更愛自己一點,也許我可以比現在活得更好﹑活得更純粹﹑活得更自在.
(the fact is that you are narcissistic enough)
(哎現在還不夠自戀麼.)

很無聊嘛我把它們翻成英文了.
是說,怎麼if 啊maybe 啊之類的字眼那麼美好又那麼殘酷.
是說,很難過呢.
還好我的淚線分泌沒旺盛到說哭就哭.
原本的原本是想些安慰的話,可惜完全走型了.
同一片天空下的你們,請務必好起來.